Badfic dump
by XxkrystalkeeperxX
Summary: Just some stuff I wrote to pass the time at school.


Ben Reeves, AKA "The Thing" was walking around Hoth searching for his pet white rat, which had myseriously escaped in the dark of the was searching in a mysterious wampa cave when he came across Princess Leia wearing nothing but the hair on her head.  
>"My esteemed princess, you cannot conduct yourself like this!"<br>Ben shreiked in a violent huff as he approached Leia.  
>"Princess... are you alright?" Ben said, sick with worry as he approached Leias still body.<br>Ben was relieved when he checked her vital sighns, and she appeared to be alive, he threw her over his horse and sauntered back to the moon base before the spiders could catch him  
>" This time, the glory shall be mine! and not that petty welp known as Spider-man!" Thought Ben, his breath grew strained and he began to sweat as he thought of Spider-mans nubile acrobatic body, but a sudden development with the princess interrupted his dirty thoughts.<br>Leia was moving now.  
>"Princess, are you alright? Ben asked with worrying as Leia sat up?<br>But then he screamed and pissed himself like a 2 year old when Leias head split open like bannanna!  
>Leia was safe having a sleepover with Han, Luke, Spider-Man, and Ryan Gosling, the Thing "The Thing Ben Reeves" had gotten was "The Thing" from the John Carpenter film "The Thing"!<br>Ben screamed as Leia systematically turned into body parts at random, the greatest scream of all was when she turned into a grotesque form of a large black man with a mohak, covered in gold chains, licking the drool of a dishevled white cripple in a robot wheelchair. Ironically, Ben Reeves's quietist scream was his last, as he perished from the pure fright of the concept of interracial relationships.

The end.

"Yo Chief, the boys frum da hood told me dat you like dat kinky -blam!-" Said YungMF as he sauntered onto the basketball court wearing a bandanna, swim trunks, and 2 wifebeaters.  
>"A yeah MizzyFizzy, I do -blam!- like I do drugs, all day, everyday, everyway, every hour,in every shower." Said Chief wearing his green spartan armor, as well as a bandanna, swim trunks, and 2 wifebeaters.<br>"Well if your as bad az you say homie, we should go back to the dirty rest stop and -blam!- in every stall dawg!" Said YungMF  
>"Fo real my blood brotha!" said Chief.<br>"But don't think this means I L-l-Like you or anything!" Said YungMF, a deep crimson blush covering his face.  
>Chief said nothing, as he was to busy picturing himself riding a scooter with a mannequin by his side.<br>When Chief and YungMF got to the bathroom, they ate hot -blam!- with milk and crackers, they then said they appreciated each others friendships and went their seperate ways in life.

Fin

Mandark was testing out his new formula when DeeDee happened to walk into the room.  
>"Bweh, now my plan will be over!" Shouted DeeDee as she took formula for Mandark and drank for self instead.<br>"No DeeDee! that potion was made as a reverse potion for me Mandark! you see! I am not Man-Dark, But Dark-Man!"  
>Deedee now knew error of ways as she began to feel body that was her own turn into body of strange man.<br>"Whuh whuh whats happein hea!" Deedee yelled in the voice of optimus prime.  
>"You are becoming the man Behing the voice of aslan the Lion!"<br>Shouted Eddie Deezen, emerging from the sound booth and yelling directly at the voice actor of DEEDEE who was without fail turning into...  
>Liam Neison!<br>"I should never have TAKEN that potion!" Yelled Liam!  
>"You fool! do you know what the FALLOUT will be!" Screemed Eddie<br>"I'm going to PONYO ass!" Liam yelled!  
>"It will be a true CLASH OF THE TITANS!" Eddie assured him"<br>Just then, the room depressurized in a vaccum, and Liam and Eddie crawled into each others arms and shared their first and final kiss.  
>The sound "A HA HA, A HA HA, A HA HA HA HA HA HA" faded into the cold night, a reminder of chances lost when we don't realize what is so close to use is the most to us.<p>

Kakuna was weeping behind the old gardening shed, when Metapod came across his friends predicament.  
>"Why is you crying" Metapod quipped with an offensive russian accent.<br>"Because everyone calls me yellow! I feel like a worthless coward!" Wept the androgynous Kakuna  
>"Silly Kakuna! did you not know I loved you so much because of my asian fetish? they are not calling you yellow because you are a coward! they are calling you yellow because they are racist!" Metapod replied while wearing an eyepatch and toque.<br>"You think so Metapod?" Kakuna asked while tears of bitter joy rolled down its slanted eyes.  
>"Eye no so Kakuna" Said Metapod, now wearing a rice farmers outfit while having his eyes made into slants with tape.<br>"Me love you long time" Kakuna replied for the final time, as the next day he would evolve into a Beedrill and leave Metapod behind.

But the memories we share as a snapshot of time  
>Will always be the illest rhymes.<p> 


End file.
